Short Order Guy

This little ditty needs a woman’s voice so just imagine you’re hearing Kacey Musgraves sing it, and everything will be OK.

If anybody shows some interest in it, I’ll write another verse or two.

I could do rhymes with pickle and fickle, mustard and mother f…  no that doesn’t rhyme. Chicken fried and bride.  Yeah, that would be a good verse.

SHORT ORDER GUY (sung by male)

Song by Greg McGee Feb 6, 2017 – July 6, 2018

This version of the song is for a MALE singer, unlike the attached file. It would probably make a good duet!


Well, I gave her my heart, she used it for hamburger.

Offered me up some lies.

She consumed me with relish, I considered it hellish.

Cause I’m only a short order guy.


Maybe she ain’t a keeper, but I ain’t a sleeper.

I can smell it when somethings’ gone bad.

When she started reeking, then I started thinkin’

That possibly, I’ze being had.


I like being consumed, but I like to be savored.

Don’t wolf me down, you’ll miss all the flavor.

All of your fantasies I could fulfill.

The ingredients ain’t lacking, do you have the skill?



Fast food rarely provides much nutrition.

And, though I’ve been burnt, you could change my condition.

Your sauce must be special to make me feel like I do.

I’ll hang up my apron, let’s make something new.


Don’t just dice me up and throw me on the grill

I could learn to soufflé and show you some thrills.

You’re in such a rush to be scrambled and fried

If you’ll turn down the heat some, we might multiply.


You oughta know by now Just how to make me come

Over to your place any ol Time You Call

I want to feel your face I know the perfect place

Where it belongs in my Arms.

I’ll leave the pots and pans, get there fast as I can

I need to see you now, quick turn the covers down.

I ain’t ashamed of it, I’m water for chocolate

I Need to see you right now. Right Now.

I’m not the kind you make dance on the griddle

I want to find a good woman, go country and settle.

Raise up a kid or three,  Barbeque when we please.

Someday, you might even do (hold on this)

the cookin’ for me.

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